Journal Entry: 26 November 2018

I wanted name my blog something like Spare Peg in a Round Hole which is pretty cliche, but it was something said during my Soul Contract reading – that I am a square peg in a round hole but need to continue to make a square hole for myself. Then I didn’t research on how many blogs have that as a title or them. It turns out to be A LOT. So scratch that idea. Instead, I thought about socks and size 11 feet – my feet, actually – and how difficult it is to get socks that fit properly. So I wrote a blog about it.

Read the rest: Stop wearing socks that don’t fit

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Journal Entry: 25 November 2017

Note: this is a long read.

View of a river where ice is beginning to build up to one side.First tattoo. Ever. Did not hurt so much – I mean, I’ve had mammograms that were more painful! Granted, they were small. The tattoo figures. It only took the tattoo artist – Jess – about twenty minutes to complete. Taken from two ancient drawings on pot shards of Earth- and Goddess-worshipping Eastern Europeans. One is a leaping dog, the other likely a running lion, don’t know for sure…. Thank you, Marja Gimbutas!

Having a dental filling is off-the-scale more painful than getting a tat was. Maybe it was the location just above my breasts. I can see why people don’t stop at having one tattoo. Something changed when I changed my body. I can see myself getting more. Maybe face ink after I retire!

Another topic – we have our Solstice gathering coming up soon. C would like the topic for us to reflect on to be our hope for the future. What do we visualize as the best outcome for ourselves, for others, for the world, for the planet. Near future, far future. What is it for me?

Continue reading Journal Entry: 25 November 2017

Journal Entry: 24 November 2017

Trees with fall colors, next to pine trees. The sun peaks through just behind them.
Nature has no To-Do list, why should I?

This morning I read an article on Medium as well as the posted replies to the article and am feeling really dumb. It was about math, education, and how it is geared toward “whiteness.” The fact that it was about math isn’t the reason I feel dumb, but the way the article was written and the challenges to the facts in the article through the replies and responses that make me feel like, WTF am I doing thinking I can write a blog??

I don’t feel like I know how to write a convincing argumentative essay, or just plain essay. The author was able to defend his words by pointing out things in his essay and in the poster’s response that made sense to me. Will I be able to write something that is defensible?

I find myself allowing scattered thoughts around a huge to-do list of my own making to take me away from pursuing the meandering thought that I’d like to concentrate on in my writing. I got up this morning with this journal in-hand, thinking that I’d write something that I could later transfer to my blog – something pithy, interesting, would make people stop and read for five minutes.

Continue reading Journal Entry: 24 November 2017

Journal Entry: 23 November 2017

Note: no journal entry for 22 November 2017.

Thanksgiving Day [not so much for Native Americans!]

But it is Native American Heritage month. But I wrote about that previously. So this morning I think it is appropriate for me to send an email to Sarah thanking her (in the spirit of Thanksgiving) for my soul contract reading. So much, no, I’d say most of what she said based on the “kabbala” of my name is so correct, so true.

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Journal Entry: 20 November 2017

Short work week because of t-giving day. I’ve been thinking about the origins of Thanksgiving – what we learning in grade school was a completely white-washed version of what really occurred. The christ-worshipping people arrived on the shore of mainland US and began to consciously and unconsciously exterminate 700-plus native peoples they encountered. That was in 1657 (that date right?) and we continue the genocide. What name do we give a genocide when it is not blatant extermination but through policy and neglect that a country kills off those who came before? Still genocide, right? The Holocaust was preceded by hundreds of years of persecution of many different groups of people. The indigenous people of Australia faced much the same genocide, still do. Not only do we all live on borrowed time, we all live on BORROWED LAND!

But my point was not to recount the horrors of domination and genocide but to bring it up from a spiritual perspective. If I am to be a truth sharer, then it seems that I say or do something when I sense injustice. I’ve felt this before for Native Americans, but I felt it strongly again after watching “Wind River” – a movie that touched upon issues faced by Native Americans. I daydream about having a lot of money to give away to the Onondaga tribe or maybe the Mohawk, so they can buy land next to the reservation since Native Americans can’t own the land on which they live [if it is reservation land] because the government owns the land. That’s just not right. This country’s culture is based on wealth. Land ownership is wealth. Building wealth lifts people out of poverty. Until such a time that the US economy collapses, there is no other real way of moving out of poverty it seems. At least not as individuals. No one lobbies for Native American rights the way the NRA has lobbyists for gun owner rights and guns aren’t even people!

See, I’m going on and on in this journal. If I’m to follow my [soul] contract, I need to be putting it out there. Not blathering it, but with forethought, using my talents, exercising underutilized spirit within me. I read on the web that there are ways to be supportive of Native Americans and there’s also a list someone compiled about authors and poets of Native American descent. Shouldn’t I do something with this information? I need to put it out there.

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Note: I haven’t put it out there yet! Ugh.

Journal Entry: 19 November 2017

Another possible post – social, cultural, spiritual symbols and symbolic acts. Such as US symbols [of late?] gun, cars, a cross, independency – “Don’t tell me what I can or can’t do.”

Reading about mythology, belief systems of Norse people, and femi-symbols.

Maiden, mother, crone
Mother, daughter, grandmother

Triple triangles intertwined.

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Journal Entry: 18 November 2017

Illustration of a raven in profile showing the head and neck
Corvus Corax

Raven
Crow
Athena
Odin
The three-legged sun crow

“Listen to your intuition and receive a message from the world of spirit” (Green, 2005)

Last night I decided to draw an Animal Spirit card from a deck I possess. I asked that an animal ally be shown to me. It was Raven. Raven came forward as my ally in this part of my life.

Physically, ravens are found mostly in western US, crows are pretty much found in the eastern US. From a spirit standpoint, Crow and Raven have overlapping spirit meaning. So while we don’t get to see ravens much, crows are ubiquitous and present the range of spiritual energies attributed to both.

As you can see by the message coming from Raven, my ally, it is saying to listen to my intuition to receive a message from the world of spirit. OMG. That’s the message I was also getting from Sarah’s reading – that I have strong intuition, strong spirit talent in the area of intuition. This made me open eyes until they were almost bulging out of their sockets. Use my intuition. Thank you, Raven!

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Reference
Quotation – Green, S. Animal Messages: Seek Inspiration from your Animal Guides. New York: Cico Books. 2005. Illustration by Pasztor, C., same title.